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Fetishism – A new approach
Synesthesia and Fetishism
I used to view my fetishism as a god given gift or curse, depending on the situation I currently had in life. As I could never answer the „why?“ question, I concentrated more on the „how?“. Rather than understanding the origin of my fetish, I asked myself, how can I make the best out of it and even gain life quality through it. It worked so far and I still think the how-question is much more important, than the “why?” question. Nevertheless, you ask yourself where does my strong attraction to certain things, in my case good looking boots, come from. Most scientist think, that it is conditioned: Meaning, certain experiences in your childhood connected sexuality to specific objects. I never really agreed, as I thought, that it has to do rather with your sense for beauty, than with sexuality. But I also I never had a better idea about the actual origin. I remember, that I was fascinated by good looking boots worn by nice ladies since early childhood. The earliest fascinating encounter I remember, was a when I was 4, at the Lago Maggiore in Switzerland. There was a good looking lady in very long, white over the knee boots, sitting in the same restaurant as we were. She was sitting inside, we were on the terrace. The Terrace was separated from the inside by a huge panorama window and she was sitting right behind it. I crawled around there for quite some time, as I felt this strong attraction to her and the boots. The same lady without the boots, would have been probably boring and uninteresting to me.
I don't think, I was conditioned by her, there was something there before. Later, when I was running a boot fetish site, I discovered, that there were more similarities between boot enthusiasts. For example the love towards gloves, often not as strong, but still noticeable. I thought, that some people just share a certain sense for aesthetics. But where does that come from? Here comes the surprising part. I found the first key, when I was researching another condition, which I have: I hate eating noises. Gum smacking of other people is pure horror for me. Going to the cinema is seldomly fun, as I am always distracted by the popcorn crunching. As a child, family dinners where eaten often without me. I would eat alone in the kitchen, as I could not take the eating noises of some family members. Now I found out, that there is actually a name for this: misophonia.
It translates to the „hatred of sound“. Regardless of the volume, certain sounds can trigger anger, hate and other strong negative emotions in people who are misophone. The research about this condition is still knew, but it is more commonly spread than you would think. Eating noises is probably the most common trigger, others are loud breathing, slurping, clicking sounds and much more. What has that to do with boot fetish? Well, I am coming to that in a bit, keep on reading. When I read more about misophonia, I learned that a lot of people who suffer with it, have also synesthesia. Synesthesia is a condition, that is often regarded rather as an ability, than a defect. People with synesthesia have connected senses. Some see colors, when they hear sounds. Others can taste noise. Also, some connect colors and emotions to letters and numbers. There are quite a few combinations of senses and emotions, that you can have. I was intrigued and took a test. Amazingly, I scored an 88%, which came a bit as a surprise to me. And here is comes my theses:
Certain shapes, that we fetishists see, trigger certain positive emotions. If the shape comes together with a woman (or man), it is connected to sexuality. Fetishism may just be a variant of synesthesia. It is therefore more a neurological phenomena, than a psychological. I hope that scientist will do more research on the topic connection between fetishsm and synesthesia in the near future. As I have been working in the “fetish industry” for about 7 years and I am very sure, that there is something to it.
The love for boots might be in your genes from the beginning. As synesthesia is mostly regarded as an ability and not a defect, you can also view your fetish as sensitive ability for beauty. If you adjust your life, to your abilities, your fetish becomes an advantage. It can bring you joy and enrichment.
If you try to adjust yourself to life, you are will be like a bird with wings, who always walks. You get around, but not as far as you could.
Please send us your thoughts. Are you diagnosed with synesthesia? You can take tests online. Search the internet to find one in your mother language. Write us!